Sean Maguire Leonidas Carmen Electra Queen Margo Ken Davitian Xerxes Kevin Sorbo Hauptmann Diedrich Bader Traitoro Method Man Persian Emissary Ike Barinholtz Dane Cook Look-a-Like / Bond Villain / Prophet Lauren Walsh Pretty Girl Tiffany Haddish Urban Girl Travis Van Winkle Sonio Jareb Dauplaise Dilio Phil Morris Messenger Jim Piddock Loyalist / Simon Cowell Look-A-Like Nicole Parker Paula Abdul Look-A-Like / Britney Spears Look-A-Like / Ellen DeGeneres Look-A-Like / Hunchback Paris Hilton Crista Flanagan Spartan Woman / Ugly Betty Look-A-Like Hunter Clary Leo, Jr. Emily Wilson Lindsay Lohan Look-A-Like John Di Domenico Donald Trump Look-A-Like Belinda Waymouth Twiggy Look-A-Like Nick Steele K-Fed Look-A-Like Jim Nieb President Bush Look-A-Like Dean Cochran Rocky Balboa / Rambo Nate Haden Ryan Seacrest Look-A-Like Jessica Heap Spartan Woman's Friend (uncredited) Tim Connolly Spartan Soldier (uncredited) Robin Atkin Downes Narrator (uncredited) Martin Klebba Happy Feet (uncredited)